Whew......

Well...

Thanksgiving has come and gone...
Now it's on to Christmas...and the one year mark of Dad passing away...

My brother, Bryan (for those of you who don't know his name) and I were talking just last week about how it's been almost a year since Daddy died...and it doesn't seem like it...

I still remember everyone that was at the hospital with us that week. We had SO many visitor the four days we were in the hospital and in the hospice hospital. Bryan got so MAD at me the night Daddy died... Dad had started hemorrhaging again that afternoon and I had had ENOUGH!! The doctor promised us that if he started again, that he would keep him sedated enough that he wouldn't be in any pain and he would just relax and he would ease off to be wth our Heavenly Father. Well, when it came down to it...the nurses couldn't/wouldn't give him what the doctor told us...so he was having to go through it again...

I got SO MAD!!! I punched the wall and told the nurse...in not a nice way...to tell that doctor to get his @$$ up there and rid my dad of the pain he was in...that he promised us he wouldn't go through it anymore... Our nurse was AWESOME!!! She called the doctor at home and told him what I said...and did...and he told her to do whatever it took to ease dad's pain...that he did tell us that...

Within 10 or 15 minutes, Dad was no longer in pain and was relaxed enough that we all put our hands on him and told him we loved him and that it was okay for him to go...he had suffered enough...

Dad took his last and final breath on December 24, 2008 at 6:18 p.m.

When he did, it was like there was a weight lifted off of our shoulders because he was no longer in pain...he was in Heaven with God, his sisters, his mom and dad, with his father-in-law, and his very best friend in the entire world, Victor Holmelin. And I truely believe that they were ALL waiting for him at those pearly gates!

The very first person I called that night as soon as it happened was Jeff. I needed to hear his voice! I needed him to tell me it was okay and that Daddy was in a much better place! And he did! No matter what, Jeff and I will ALWAYS be there for each other when we need the other one!

It was SO HARD telling the girls. They loved and still love their Paw Paw very much!! Neither one of them can go out to see his headstone yet...but when they are ready...they will...and I will never force them to do it! It's something that they need to do when they are ready to do it. I'm sure Karson will be ready before Megan...my Munchkin remembers Daddy when he wasn't sick...when he could get down in the floor and play with her at 2 and 3 years old and let her put bows and clips and hats etc. on him and in his hair. Karson only remembers a Paw Paw that has been sick all of her life...he had his first stroke before she was a year old... He still did most of those things with Karson...but he was able to do more with Megan...

We miss you so much Daddy! I can't believe you've been gone almost a year...but I know you are so much better now!! And we wouldn't want you back they way you were...we wouldn't want anyone to go through what you went through the last four to six months you were alive.

LOVE,

YOUR PEANUT!!!

Our new puppy...

This is Behr. He's a Maltese/Shih tzu hybred. He's the cutest thing ever! He was Karson's birthday present from me...

This is Berh in his Halloween t-shirt. He did not like it at all!! He took it off!! LOL!!

The other one is him after getting his hair cut... Him and his evil eyes! LOL!!

...BLAH/BAD DAY...

I feel crappy today...
I really need to go get a flu shot!!
I haven't had one yet this year...and I think that's my problem...

Well...today is the anniversary of when we buried daddy...and it hurts today just like it did nine months ago... My best friend from birth...Michael (our parents grew up together and when we were born...we were next to each other from the time we were born...except I had to wait a couple of hours for him...I'm like three or four hours older...LOL... Our moms waddled down the hall together and all... As we grew older...we stayed close...)...has his grandma's funeral today... Mrs. Martin was ALWAYS the sweetest lady! She always had a smile on her face. And was a GREAT Christain! She will be missed by all!

Mom and I went to the funeral home last night...and I made it about three steps into the the actual chapel and had to leave... All the flowers and people...was just like when Daddy died... I had to stay out front in the foyer... I've always hated funeral homes...but now...I can't stand the sight of them...especially that one... Last night was the second time I've had to go there since Daddy died...and I don't want to do it again!

I haven't had a "cry day" in a while (I have them about once every month or so...I was having them about once a week)...and I think it's going to be one today... I know that Daddy is in a MUCH BETTER place...but I just wish he was still here and well...

Until next time....

WOO HOO!!!!

Ok...so I told NO ONE (but her Daddy, Nanna, uncle Bryan, Megan and Angie about this)....but last night I took my lovely, wonderful, loving daughter downtown for an audition for commercials....

AND SHE GOT A CALL BACK!!!!

I'm in tears!!! This is going to be AWESOME for her and her self-esteem!!! I can't wait to tell her!!!!

A Day of Remembrance....

I remember where I was, who I was with, and what we were doing that day eight years ago! My now ex-husband is a ex-Marine and now (as he was that day) a police officer. I remember waking him up that morning and telling him the news. He ran into the living room and watch in disbelief what was happening to our country. I remember him getting ready for work and kissing me and our daughter goodbye and telling us he loved us and he would see us later that night…But we didn’t see him later that night…he had to work over and stand guard at the port of Houston in La Porte… He got home the next morning and the first thing he did was give our daughter and I a hug and kiss and tell us he loved us… It’s a day that I will NEVER forget… God Bless all of the men, women and children that lost their lives that day and all of their families…

Thank you to all of the service men and women in the Army, Navy, Air Force, Coast Guard, National Guard and the Marines, all of the police officers, and all of the firefighters who put their lives on the line every day to protect us!!

THANK YOU!!!

Tasty Bite....

Sorry for giong so LONG between posts!!! I've been SUPER BUSY with my new job...and Karson...and Behr (the new puppy...crazy little dog he is!!!) and everything else going on in our lives... I promise to post more often!!! Since it's been so long...here's a tasty bite to add to your books...


A new one.....and it's a GREAT one!!!



FRIED DILL PICKLES
Printed from COOKS.COM
3-4 lg. whole dill pickles
1/2 c. all-purpose flour
1/2 c. beer
1 tbsp. cayenne pepper
1 tbsp. paprika
1 tbsp. black pepper
1 tsp. salt
2 tsp. garlic salt
3 dashes hot pepper sauce



Cut dill pickles into 1/4 inch thickness. Combine flour, beer, cayenne, paprika, pepper, salt, garlic salt and hot pepper sauce in a medium mixing bowl.
Dip pickle slices into batter. Heat oil 375 degrees. Fry pickles until they float to the surface about 4 minutes.

Until next time.....

Kari's Taco Soup

I LOVE this soup man!!! It's the BOMB!!!!!

Kari's Taco Soup:

2 pounds Hamburger Meat
1 package Taco Seasoning
1 package Hidden Valley Ranch Dressing Mix
1 can Ranch Style Beans
1 can Kidney Beans
1 can Black Beans
1 can corn
1 bag Velvetta cheese (shreeded)

Brown meat (drain it too after its brown...you don't want the added grease...lol); add taco seasoning and ranch style dressing mix; add canned (you can use frozen if you prefer it) vegetables - cook to desired tenderness; add cheese a little
at a time so it all melts good…. Season with salt and pepper to taste… (Spoon you some into a bowl and top with cheese and sour cream...makes it extra yummy!!!)

**You can use any beans that you like...I've also used pinto beans and navy beans and it turned out great then too!!!**

ENJOY!!!!!

Something Yummy....

Ok...I know...I know...I didn't do it every working day last week...lol...

So...here's one for today....


Kari's Cheese Soup

1 bag Colby / Monterray Jack cheese
1 bag Monzerrella cheese
1 block Velvetta cheese
1 packet Knorr Spring Vegetable Soup Mix
2 Tablespoons Chicken Base (not the cubes...use the paste kind...it's the best!!!)
1 pint Half & Half (I use the fat-free one...you CAN'T tell the difference!!!)
1- 2 pints 2% milk (I use skim milk...because that's what we drink...)
1 stick Butter
8 cups Water
1 cup Carrots (finely grated)

Put water, chicken base, butter, carrots, and Knorr soup mix in a soup pot and bring to a boil.
Cook long enough to get the soup mix and carrots good and tender. Cube up block of velvetta and add to the pot as you cube it up. Let that cook a bit until the velvetta is melted and combined with the other ingredients. Add the bags of cheese one at a time to let them melt and combine with the other ingredients. Add the 1/2 & 1/2 and one pint of milk. Bring it back to a boil and add the remaining pint of milk to make it to your thinkness. (It is also good if you add broccoli florets to it but if you add the florets, add them in when you add the carrots, so they cook through.)

This is REALLY, REALLY good!!! Rich as can be...but GOOD!!!! I love making it on a cool night (face it...we live in Texas...we don't really have cold nights...LOL). We also throw some crutons on top of it...makes it better!!!

I hope you enjoy it as much as we do!!

Until next time....

YUMMY Cheese Straws!!!

Ok...so I've thought about this for a long time. I have some GREAT recipes...so I thought that I would share one a day (work day) with you... (This one I got from one of the other blogs I read...so I thought that I would share her's first...it sounds YUMMY!!!!) I have a TON of them...so if you want something...I'm sure I have it... I'll take requests...

Day One: Cheese Straws - Starwoodgal http://starwoodgal.wordpress.com/

2 cups grated cheese (sharp or regular)

1/2 cup butter or margarine

1 teaspoon baking powder

1 teaspoon salt

2 tablespoons cold water

1 1/2 cups flour

1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper

Cream butter and cheese together. Sift flour and baking powder. Add salt and cayenne pepper. Form in dough as pie crust (this means not to stir or handle it too long.....it will make the dough tough and you don't want tough cheese straws!!!). Roll out as thin as pastry (which means get it pretty thin...but not TOO thin...LOL). Cut in strips with a pastry wheel (a pizza cutter works just as good as a pastry wheel...). Spray pan with cooking oil (I use butter flavored Crisco in the can). Lay cheese straws on the pan...not too close together...about 1/2 inch apart. Bake at 400 degrees for 5 to 8 minutes. Remove from pan and place straws on cooling rack to cool as soon as you take them out of the oven... Enjoy!!! Let me know how you like them!!

Daddys Headstone

Daddys headstone is being placed today. I wanted to be there when they placed it (he said that I could help him and that he would bring an extra shovel for me) but since I started the new job, I can't. This really sucks!! I'm going there as soon as I get finished with cleaning the kitchen after dinner. Kristie may go with me if she can. If not, I'll go by myself. I like going by myself because I can "talk" to him. Lol. Miss him so much! Love you Daddy!

vaCAtion....

Get it?? vaCAtion... We went to CAlifornia... LOL... We went all over Northern CAlifornia... Carmel, Monterey, Napa, Sanoma, and San Francisco... We had a blast!! Here are a few pics....

From top left to right:

Our view from our condo in Carmel; The Aquarium in Monterey; At Bubba Gump's in Monterey; Pebble Beach Golf Club in Pebble Beach; Riding horses in Pebble Beach Riding Club; and V. Sattui Winery in Napa Valley.

There are MANY MORE....but the page wouldn't hold them all...LOL... I took close to 500 pictures!! I will upload them to MySpace and FaceBook this weekend... Check them Monday to see if they are there yet...LOL...

Have a great afternoon... I'm not going to...I have to go to the vet and pick Kokoa up... We had to have her put to sleep today... :( She's been really sick...and I didn't want her suffering anymore!! She needed blood and plasma transfusions and the dr. said that it was going to cost an EXTREME amount to do that... We tried vitamins and steriods...but she didn't get any better... I noticed that when we would go to pick her up that she would whine and cry...so there's something more going on... And even though she's only 3 1/2...I couldn't let her suffer!! Say a few extra prayers for Karson... She knows that this could have happened...but I haven't told her yet... I didn't want to ruin her day at Moody Gardens with Aunt Vicki, Nanna, Conner and Uncle Gary...so I told Nanna not to tell her... That I would tell her when I got home... Uncle Bryan knows and he's going to dig us a hole to bury her in when he gets home from work. I told him Karson didn't know yet, so don't let her see you digging the hole...

Until next time ya'll....

~Kari~

Goodness...

Well... My mom told me something yesterday that is a little wierd!!

Bryan was at the house one night and he was there by himself.... He walked down the hallway and stopped and looked at our HS graduation pictures hanging on the wall... He never stops and looks at them...but he did... Well...he was standing there and all of a sudden...he heard "HumpUm" (the sound my dad ALWAYS made...like clearing his throat)... It scared him half to death!!!

THEN....mom is home yesterday by herself.... She's in the living room or kitchen doing something... Well...all of a sudden...she hears... 'crash, boom, bang!' ... She looks in all the cabinets and nothing falls...looks in the bathrooms...nothing fell... She walks down the hallways...and just so happen to look up...the attic door is hanging open about six inches!! She waits until someone is there...MeeMaw...before she opens the door...she didn't want to get knocked out by something falling... She said that it was one of the boxes from the other side of the attic...one that had not been touched in YEARS!!!

Now...you tell me how that sound and that box fell???

I do NOT believe in ghosts....but....I do believe in spirits and angels...

Daddy's doing a GREAT job watching over us!

Love you Daddy!

Today...

...I can tell today that it's going to be a bad day...

...I'm looking at old pictures of when Karson was born and there are so many with her and my dad...

...Today's going to be a bad day...

...He is SO MISSED!!!...

...Love you Dad...

NEW JOB!!!!

Well...

I got a new job!!! YEAH ME!!!!!

I will be leaving Crosby ISD after 7 years and starting a new journey at Sheldon ISD building their purchasing department from the ground up!!

I'm REALLY excited about this!!! It's not too far from home....so that's GREAT!!!

I'm going to miss my CISD family, but I know that I will make a new one at SISD!!!

Thanks for all the loving prayers in hopes that it would turn out the way I wanted it to!!

25 Random Things
I was tagged in a 25 Random Things about me on Facebook. I’m posting it here.


1. I hate dressing up. I think I always have. I’d rather be in jeans and chucks and a hoodie than heels and a dress. I’m the least girly/grown-up person I know.

2. I don’t like being around people who are worried about being appropriate all the time. My kind of people are the people who laugh at fart jokes or make inappropriate comments at the dinner table. Maybe it’s classless, but I think it makes life more interesting.

3. I love to dance and sing... Especially when I embarrass Karson!!

4. I’m a really good cook and I love entertaining. I can't wait to have my own place again so I can entertain!!

5. I have a crazy dog!! Actually, she's Karson's...but...I'm the one who takes care of her...

6. I’m not above drinking boxed wine. But not that Franzia crap. Bota Box is decent. Black Box is also decent. I justify it as being more environmentally friendly and economical.

7. I love my job as a mom!!

8. I am lucky. Just in general. I find myself in oddly lucky situations.

9. I never missed The O.C.!! I watched it every week!

10. I can type close to 90 WPM.

11. I am quick to make friends. If I like you and feel a connection right off the bat, we will be friends for life. By the same token, if for some reason you rub me the wrong way or I don’t really feel like we have anything in common or anything to say to one another, you’ll immediately be shifted into the “people I don’t really care for” category. Maybe that’s mean, but that’s what happens.

12. Someday I want to write a book. It has been a dream of mine for years...I can't tell you how many itmes I have started and stopped!! And when I do finally write it...all of you have to buy it!! No freebies... LOL

13. On average, I drink 2 large cups of coffee in the morning and 2 in the afternoon.

14. I would love to interview a celebrity! I just think it would be cool!

15. I love to blog!! And I love to read different blogs....DAILY.... I love reading what's happening on PW's ranch. http://thepioneerwoman.com/

16. I’ve love to Twitter. I’ve made amazing friends, found job opportunities… all with the help of Twitter.

17. I still use MySpace...but I don't go to it daily like I used to...

18. At times, I have the attention span of a 4 year old. I can’t sit still. I get bored easily. Relaxing is hard for me.

19. I have questionable music taste. As in, I love pop and all of the soft rock hits from the 70’s, 80s, 90’s and today. I like stuff I can sing to. Loudly.

20. As I get older, my shopping obsession has turned from clothes to housewares. And I love Etsy for original stuff.

21. Other than missing my family and friends, I would love to move away!!!

22. I could give up chocolate, but never cheese. I’m a savory kind of gal.

23. I have a blog and it’s pretty awesome (and you are reading it right now).

24. I love my new phone...even though it is smarter than me! I'm still trying to figure the crazy thing out!!

25. Karson is my world!! I wouldn't know what to do without her!

Time...

Whew...time seems to fly by...TOO FAST!!!
I celebrated my 34th bday Saturday...at home with my sick daughter...and loved every minute of it...
BUT...she said something that I will never forget...
Mom...since you are 34 now and I'll be 9 in a few months...when you are 35....I'll be 10!!! I almost fell out of my chair!!!!!!
I can't believe that I will be 35 next year and have a 10 year old!!!
Time flies too FAST!!!

Missed my dad SO MUCH!!!!!

Love and miss you daddy!!!

A few funnies

I was searching the net and came across the following... They are quite funny...

DEFINITIONS NOT IN DICTIONARY

ADULT:
A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.

BEAUTY PARLOR:
A place where women curl up and dye.

CANNIBAL:
Someone who is fed up with people.

CHICKENS:
The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.

COMMITTEE:
A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.

DUST:
Mud with the juice squeezed out.

EGOTIST:
Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

HANDKERCHIEF:
Cold Storage.

INFLATION:
Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

MOSQUITO:
An insect that makes you like flies better.

RAISIN:
Grape with a sunburn..

SECRET:
Something you tell to one person at a time.

SKELETON:
A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.

TOOTHACHE:
The pain that drives you to extraction.

TOMORROW:
One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.

YAWN:
An honest opinion openly expressed.

WRINKLES:
Something other people have. I have character lines.

LOL...I never would have thought of them this way... Have a Blessed day!!

....

Ok...it's been a while since I posted... I know...I know...

Been busy...all I can say!

We had spring break.....cleaned Karson's room...didn't get rid of as much as I wanted to of course!...but...at least I got started... Then we went to MiMi and Kenneth's in Louisiana....and had a BLAST!!! It's always fun to stay up most of the night and have 'girl talk' with your 'sisters'!!! We will have to do that again....SOON!!!!! We did go to the casino one night...and had a blast!! We went to the Louisiana Nursery Festivle in Forrest Hill, LA while we were there. I bought a Japanese Magnolia... I had one at my house in town before I sold it and I loved it... Dad used to like it too....he said it looked really nice there by the driveway... So - when we were going back to MiMi's from our shopping spree Friday evening (before JAS got there - she was mad that we went shopping without her - but she got over it...she ended up getting a shirt out of it...lol) we were going through downtown Pineville....and I almost had a heart attack.... I look up and the street sign says...Leroy St. ...I wanted that sign!! After JAS got there that night...we went back to see if we could get it...Yes...I am almost 34 and wanted to steal the street sign!! Lord, please forgive me! BUT...the good Lord was working against us...it wouldn't come off!!! So, I didn't get my sign to be put next to my new tree...but...I did get my tree and got it planted finally yesterday. It looks pretty good...it just needs to grow...so probably in 20 years...it will be big enough to be really pretty...LOL...

Anyways...that's all I have been up to... See ya and love ya!

The Middle Place...

Okay...so I started reading The Middle Place. It's about a lady named Kelly that finds out she has breast cancer... I know...you are probably asking yourself "Why on Earth is Kari reading a book about that...now??"....well...I actually think it will help me get through all of this better... Mee Maw goes EVERY day for radiation treatments for her breast cancer...don't know for sure after she's done if she will have to have chemo (they said she probably wouldn't) or if she will have to have surgery again (since the doctor didn't get it all the first time like she "thought" she did)!! So...I'm reading it... It's also about the relationship between her and her dad... A LOT like my relationship with my dad... I have laughed and cried while reading this book...and I'm only about five chapters into it!! Anyway...I will update again once I have read it more...

BUT....here are a few more pics from our Girls Day Out photo shoot!!

Girls Day Out pics....

OMGoodness... We took pictures Friday afternoon...and those that I have seen on Viv's website are GREAT!!!! I can't wait to see the rest of them!!! Go check us out!!!

http://heartspunimagery.typepad.com/heart_to_heart/

FINALLY FINISHED IT....

I finally finished the Twilight series!! It was SO good!! For those who haven't read it yet...it was SO worth it!!! I "drug my feet" reading the last book so I wouldn't finish it...LOL... The series was wonderful! I can't wait for the movie to come to DVD so I can buy it and watch it (even though some say it's not as good as the book - but no movies really are...they take too much out for the movies). Then for the New Moon movie....and so forth!! I REALLY wish she would finish the fifth book!!! But now...someone had to go and put it online for everyone to see before she finished it...that person should be dealt with...LOL...just kidding...

National Cheerleading Association Competition....

We are headed to Beaumont this weekend for Katelyn's NCA Competition... Go Dynamic Cheer!! The Blue, The Green, The White!!! They are too cute!! There are some talented little girls out there that do cheerleading... BUT...when they get my age...they are goign to wish they hadn't done it!! Arthritis sets in on the knees, wrists, hands, feet, legs, back, shoulders, etc... Anyway...good luck this weekend Katelyn...Autn Kari will be screaming for you!!! Love you!!!

New Moon

I finally finished Twilight while Karson was at Girl Scouts... And picked up New Moon and started it as soon as I put Twilight down... LOVE THEM!!!

...TORN....

I'm torn.... I don't know what to do about something... Please pray that it will all work out the way it should!!

....MAN....

I thought that I would get finished with Twilight last night....

BUT I DIDN'T!!!!!

I'll finish it tonight!! That's for sure... I can read it while Karson's at Girl Scouts...LOL...

XOXO

...TWILIGHT...

OK....so I've read half of the book Twilight....and I LOVE IT!!! I can't wait to finish this one and for Angie to finish the second one so I can start on it!!!! I have found a new author...Stephenie Meyer is really good!! How she came up with this is beyond me... I need to go to her website and read it...but not until I finish the book...she gives things away on her site...

Until next time...

Oh yeah - by the way - post aobut Megan's 13th Birtday party with pics are soon to come!!

.....Twilight.....

Well....I finally took the "Twilight" bug by the horns and started reading it!! So far so good!! I had to force myself to put it down last night in order to go to bed!!! I'll let you know more of how I like it the further I get into the book. Angie said she read it in a week...so I know I'll be finished with it in a few days!! Once I get into a book....I can't put it down!! I stay up until 3 or 4 o'clock in the morning reading on the weekends!! I LOVE to read!! Anything...doesn't matter what it is... I'm not real crazy about Sci-Fi...but everything else is a go with me!! I mostly read Catherine Coulter, Debbie Macomber, Jodi Picoult, Linda Miller-something or other...can't remember her exact last name... Anyway...I LOVE to read!! I get that from my daddy!! He was an avid reader!! Anyway...love to all!!

Until next time....

My Munchkin...

Well...my niece Megan will be 13 years old this weekend!! I can't believe it!! My Munchkin is growing up!! And too fast!! Love you baby girl! I met Jeff for dinner Friday night and he couldn't believe that she was turning 13 this weekend! He can remember tagging her along with us everywhere he went when he came home on leave. She was always mistaken for ours...but we got used to it. I kept her from the time she was six weeks old until she started preschool...and then I had her on some of those days too! She's actually 13 going on 21!! So smart and tall and beautiful!!

Love you girlie!! I hope you have a GREAT birthday this weekend!! And remember....we will do the chicken dance and other crazy dances together this weekend!!! I'll be ready to start decorating at 4:30 p.m. Friday!!

LOVE YOU!!!!

Past few days....

Well...it's that time of year again... The mini talent show at NES (Karson's school) was this week. She decided that she would sing... That's right...she wanted to sing a song... Well...she wanted to sing White Horse by Taylor Swift. She practiced a lot at home...every evening you could hear her through her door singing it over and over. She knows EVERY word...and sounded GREAT!!! Wednesday came and she didn't have the disk - it was sitting on my desk... I was asked if I wanted to go watch her (no parents were invited...it was the kiddos only...BUT...that's one of the perks of working in the District) and I could only go Thursday morning so I was going to be able to go.

Well...she got here Wednesday afternoon and said that she wasn't going to do it...she was too scared and nervous about doing it. So I said ok. THEN she comes in yesterday and tells me that shes decided to do it...TODAY... In front of the entire 3rd grade!! I said ok. Well...I send Abby an instant message asking if she did it or not...and she said that she was keeping her for last in case I was coming. SO...the great mom that I am...I speed (literally) to NES and make it there before she sings... And as soon as I get there....they tell me she decided NOT to sing!! Oh well...I got to see my baby girl for a few minutes... I walked into the gym and she was sitting with some of my friends (teachers - not kiddos) and she saw me and her eyes lit up!! She asked what I was doing there and I told her and she got a frown on her face and said "But I'm not singing...are you mad?" Of course I wasn't mad! And I told her that!! I could never be mad at her for something like that... I rarely ever get mad at her... Only if she doesn't turn her homework in, leaves a mess at the table, or leaves her clothes all over the bathroom and bedroom floors... And when I have to fight with her about homework...other than that...I NEVER get mad at or or have to get on to her. She's the perfect kiddo!! So caring and loving!!

She's the light of my eyes!!!

My baby girl.....

I am so proud of my baby girl! She got two awards at school Friday!!! One for getting the honor roll and one for making an A on her Reading Benchmark!! Way to go Karsie!!! Just wanted to give her some kudoos!!

She's doing a little better with my dad's death. She was just so close to him that him passing away really got to her! She was his "little nurse" when he felt bad. She used to rub his feet for him when they were swollen. When she saw his hand on his forehead, she knew that it meant that he had a headache so she would run into the bathroom and wet a fresh bathrag and bring it to him. It made my heart hurt even worse when I would look at her and she would just be sitting there crying. She's been sleeping with my mom a lot here lately and the other night I went into the bedroom to tell her good night and she was smelling the pillow. I knew what she was doing...but I had to ask... She said "it smells like Paw Paw" and I asked her to let me see and it did. The next morning she told mom that she dreamed about him that night and that he wasn't sick anymore and that when she went to bed that night, that she saw him laying there in bed. Mom told her it was ok, that she see's him too sometimes.

Well...now that I have myself crying...I'm going to go for now.

Until next time.....all of our love...

My Karson...

My baby girl finally had a smile on her face this evening!! It is so good to see her smile again....and laugh and play again!! She hasn't done much of that at home since my dad died... When we aren't here...she does...but not much at home and she did today... Mom and I both remarked that it was good to see her laugh and smile again!! Mrs. Smith, her counselor at school, called her into her office and talked to her yesterday. That was one of the first things she told me when she got in the car to come home yesterday... She said that she told her that any time she left like she was getting upset and about to cry...to tell her teacher and the teacher would let her come to her office for a couple of minutes...which is good...but I told Karson not to do it too much... She needed to stay in class as much as possible...and she understood...

A little note on me...

I thought that I would be able to get through this without having a migraine...man was I ever WRONG!!! I had to come home from work today because of it!! I noticed that I had "floaters" (when you can't completely see out of your eyes...those who get migrainesknow what I'm talking about) this morning...so I took some Excedin Migraine (4 of them) to stop it before it really got started....well...that DIDN'T work!! It kept getting worse...by the time I left the office (I tried sticking it out as long as I could...had to leave at 10:45 a.m.) I couldn't see out of my left eye the floaters were so bad and I was SO sick to my stomach... It was bad!! Bad enough that Raimie and Sherryl told me to call them when I got home so they would know I made it safely to the house... I was so sick...I couldn't call...thank God mom was here...I had her call Raimie becuase I knew she knew her number and I told mom to tell Raimie to tell Sherryl that I was home safe... I got home took one of my migraine pills and crashed in the cave - my mom and dad's room...it gets relly dark in there - for four hours...got up and it wasn't any better so I took another pill and went back into the cave...for four more hours... Mom left at 3 something to go get Karson off the bus and go to Megan basketball game and then they didn't get home until 6:30ish...and I had only been up about 30 minutes... I just took another pill because I still feel like crap and hoping I won't wake up with it in the morning!!

So - wish me luck!!!

Until next time....love to all...

My thoughts....

Are mostly about my mom and dad right now. They had rough times in their marriage...but mostly it was good. I remember the good times at we had at the river house when we were kids... We (us kids) used to smoke the grapevines from the trees on the hills down to the sand... Yes...we were crazy...I know...but we had a blast!! I will never forget this one time that us kids were there with my MeeMaw and PawPaw and we were playing in the piles of leaves and my brother got a leaf stalk (whatever it's called) jammed into his ear and we had to take him to the hospital in Cleveland...

My parents would always drive us into town (Cleveland) for snow cones!! Our favorite was always the pink panther...we never got anything else...Angie and I found one at the sugar shack in Crosby that's close to it...but I can't remember the name...I will have to ask her...

My parents are awesome people!! I'm worried about my mom and what she will do during the day now... Since she retired...she has taken care of my dad...for two years now!! And it's going to be really hard for her right now... But, I know that my dad is watching over her (and us)... She will be doing a lot of stuff at Karson's school...I'm sure of that... And she also stated that she will probably get a job..."even if I'm just a checker ar Wal-Mart...I have to do something...I won't be able to just sit in the house...that's for sure!!" were her exact words!! So - if anyone knows of something part-time...hit me up and let me know and I will pass it on to her...

My dad was the hardest worker I knew... And my brother falls fast behind him! When dad was forced to quit work do to his disability, he still tinkered outside in the woodshed making things... He would sit out there on his stool and work away for as long as he could...about an hour at a time... There in the end...it was less and less that he was able to get out there...

He made Karson's cradle that she slept in when Jeff and I brought her home from the hospital... And I will cherish it ALWAYS!! Many Kilgore (and non-Kilgore) babies have slept in it since then also.... First Karson (of course), then my best friend Miranda's second child (her first are Karson are 9 days apart...told you she's my best friend...we did everything togeter...even having our first kids together..LOL), and then my Janna-Bananna, and then Jacob. Now it holds Karson's dolls and stuffed animals... Well, some of them!! LOL...

My dad was a wonderful man that is going to be terribly missed by many, many people!!!

That's all for now...

Until next time...

My Dad....

You know...my dad was sick for SO LONG that we had said that when he passed away that we would be "prepaired" for it... But...we weren't!! This has been so HARD for all of us!! Karson is having a really hard time with it. I met with her teachers today for our annual parent/teacher conference and told them about it. They said that they would each give her a little extra TLC... They are such sweet teachers!! I couldn't have asked for better! I also spoke with her counselor as well about it. She said that she might call Karson into her office and just chat with her and let her know if she ever wanted to talk to someone other than us...that's she's there for her. I said that was a great idea!! That's one of the many reasons a counselor is at each campus...

We miss my dad so MUCH!!! But - none of us would want him back the way he was!! He hurt SO BAD the last few months...but when his girls were around...he would put on a happy face for them! He LOVED his baby girls so much!! All of us have said numerous times that the reason he lasted so long was because he was living for them!! Don't get me wrong...he loved us and wanted to stay here for us too...but his baby girls were his heart from the first time he held them and told them he loved them until the last time!!

Well...I just wanted to thank everyone for all the love and support and prayers the past few weeks!! Just make sure you keep them coming! The girls (and us too) need as many as we can get...

Love to all...and until next time....